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6 Reasons Your Love Life Isn't Where You Want It to Be. And What to Do!

Updated: Sep 12, 2021

Are you successful in all areas of your life except for the one big one - love?

Are you searching for the right life partner and are having little luck?

You’re not alone.

Are you feeling disappointed, overwhelmed, sad, frustrated or apprehensive?

You’re not alone.

And we're here to tell you there is another way to find what you’re looking for.

Dating coaches are helping people from all walks of life find good life partners and build happy and fulfilling relationships, get married and having their happy ever after.

So if, you feel like giving up on love - don’t - you can have your happy ever after!

Are you someone that want to share your life with a life partner?

Maslow’s hierarchy of needs highlights that people do not thrive without love.

Imagine how much better life would be with the unconditional support and love from a partner by your side?

It’s possible for you and first you need understand what’s been holding you back until now.

6 things that are likely holding you back from finding love.

1. You’re too focused on your job.

Are you someone that is passionate about your job?

Do you easily get caught up in the next promotion, the next launch, the next project?

Have you ever worked on the weekend when you didn’t need to?

Pouring ourselves into work can be an excuse or distraction to avoid the void that exits. The problem with focussing too much on work is that we often lose sight of what truly makes us happy and one day you may just wake up wondering if you’ve missed the boat to have your happy ever after forever partner.

What to do:

Set new boundaries that enable you to finish work at a reasonable hour and leave your weekends free for focussing on your own wellbeing. Ask yourself, how would my 94 year old self want me to enjoy my free time?

Focus on doing activities that make you feel good and at the same time free up your calendar to have at least x3 1 hour dating slots per a week.

2. You’re not proactively seeking out new people

This means that you are brave enough to spend time to meet new people out of your usual circle. Do you meet with the same people week in week out and go to the same restaurants and bars?

What to do:

Be proactive in organizing at least 1 new activity each month to meet someone new. It may be that you join a networking group like Internations or take up a new hobby. If you haven’t already, register on a dating app, you don’t have to take this too seriously, you can use this to practice meeting new people

3. You’re settling for less.

It’s important to know what your happy ever after goal is. Do you want to be married with kids? Do you want kids only? Are you looking to move in with someone? Then make a note of how you want to feel in that relationship happy ever after. Do you want to feel loved, cherished, safe and cared for?

What to do:

Without making a check list (e.g. must be xx height / have xxx type of job), communicate your needs to potential partners and if someone isn’t meeting one of your primary needs, or is not investing in dating you or your relationship, then it is time to move on - only make space for people who have the same relationship goal and the key qualities you need to be happy and fulfilled plus are willing to make you a priority.

The earlier you do this (after giving someone a fair chance) the easier it will be and the more likely you will be to find what you are truly looking for.

4. You’re putting too much pressure on yourself and potential partners.

Do you make a decision on a potential partner after just one date? Are you in a hurry to find your partner and you are trying to be efficient at not wasting your time? When you do this you put pressure on yourself and the potential partner and you may discard people too quickly without even giving them a chance.

What to do:

Try and date each person at least 3 times before you make a decision on them unless you were not treated well / did not have good conversation / did not feel any attraction at all and if they did not show any qualities that are important for your happy ever after

5. You aren’t investing enough time and energy.

If you want to be in a happy, fulfilling, committed relationship but you are currently single ask yourself these questions:

How much does finding love mean to you?

How much time, energy and resources have you invested in your personal happiness and finding a life partner?

What to do:

Dedicate at least 3 hours a week to finding a relationship. This could be made up of swiping on a dating app / having calls with matches / meeting potential matches for 1 hour / participating in a new class / activity

6. You are dating in the wrong energy

If you’re a women and you are wanting a masculine energy guy, you may be dating in your masculine energy which mean that you are over-functioning, trying to chase men, move the dating process forward

What to do instead:

Practice using the STOP Tool. This means not doing any of the following during the dating process: Suggesting, Trying, Organising, Persuading. This are all masculine energy traits and it’s important that you find your feminine energy back

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